Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Festive Season Sale!


Hi guys,
To celebrate the publication of my third Ghostwriter Mystery, Last Writes, I'm offering the ebook at the discounted price of just $1.99 over the festive season—but you need to get in quick. This offer is only available to Amazon readers and will return to full price early in the new year.

Last Writes sees the return of sassy ghostwriter Roxy Parker and her motley friends and family. This time, someone is killing best-selling authors—a science-fiction writer has been found violently slashed with an ‘X’, a gardening guru bludgeoned with his own shears, and an erotic novelist poisoned by a juicy apple. All the evidence points firmly at Roxy's beloved agent, Oliver, but she's not convinced. With the help of seductive newcomer, crime reporter David Lone, Roxy must hunt down the killer before another author meets their final sentence... Little does Roxy know, a ghostwriter is next on the hit list! Will this be Roxy Parker's last writes? 

Happy reading! (And please do get in touch with all your great feedback and comments.)

xo Christina

Thursday, December 6, 2012

Greek Expectations (excerpts from my next novel)

Hi guys. I have started work on a new novel of a very different kind. While this one is a riddle wrapped in a riveting mystery, it's not about murder or mayhem, at least not in a physical sense. Instead it is about a woman's journey to a small Greek Island where she is in search of a missing diary.

Why? What is in this elusive diary? And why has she deserted her post as Editor of a glossy Sydney women's magazine to travel halfway across the world to find it?

I hope you enjoy this first, tantalising taste... Don't forget to post any comments and look for my other writing at: http://freequickreads.blogspot.com.au/view/magazine
Or: www.amazon.com
www.smashwords.com

Happy reading!
xo Christina


Greek Expectations
by Christina Larmer
© Larmer Media

CHAPTER 1
“I wish I could take my heart and plaster up the edges where cracks are starting to form, to smother it in putty and place it back again.”
SOLINA

Fog gathered like cotton wool, loosened into stringy wisps on the shores of Sarisi Bay and the fishermen ignored it like they might their wives at home, and simply went about their business, checking sails, freeing ropes, rolling one for the road. A whistle, a coo-ee and in waves they set off, first one boat, then another, then two more, each slicing through the silence until the fog rejoined to gobble them whole with only the faint scent of their cheap tobacco left to remind us they were even there.

From the esplanade, Solina watched them without really taking them in, as though a passing image in the movie of someone else’s life. Even as the tobacco dissipated, she watched, her hands thrust determinedly into her too-thin coat, its pockets so high up she had to bend her elbows to keep them from the cold. This coat had caused a stir in the office when first she’d worn it. A black, wool coat with shearling trim. So luxurious, so now. And now so inappropriate. What she needed was a thick parka, with lambswool lining, perhaps. And a hood. Instead, she had a flimsy cotton beanie offering little comfort to ice-cold hair that had become limp with dew.

Still, the chill was not entirely unwelcome. It numbed her a little, matching her mood.  Beneath the coat the edge of her black pleated skirt caught in her flat-heeled boots and she noticed for the first time in hours that her feet had ceased to ache. They were numb, too (at least she’d thought to leave the stilettos behind). She made no effort to move, though, just stared out to sea surprised by its oily darkness and the smoke that her breath was now making, clouding up her view. Something else replaced it. A memory from a long time ago: a blonde and a brunette, giggling as they gulp in the crisp air between two long fingers pushed against red lips. Their fingers move away swiftly as they exhale, their lips upturned Hollywood-style into the sky and they watch as the condensation conjures up imaginary cigarette smoke before their eyes.

A dog’s howl snapped her lips shut and she glanced around. Releasing one hand from its warm cubby hole, she scooped up her Louis Vuitton bag and returned to the road, hesitating only briefly before turning away from town and towards Coso Point. Her feet felt warmer now and were beginning to throb again, yet she walked on regardless. It was a good half-hour’s walk to the top, but she had prepared herself for the climb and stopped every 10 minutes or so, resting on her bag and staring at the road ahead before switching it to the other hand and continuing on.

Questions began to creep up on her as she walked. What was she doing here? What if it’s not there? But this is Greece, she told herself. Things don’t get pulled down when their use-by date is up. She jiggled her head a little as though shaking some thought away and pressed on. And then it came into view, a thick black blot upon the horizon, and she almost managed a smile. By the time Solina reached the castle her head was throbbing harder than her feet, her nose dribbling freely, her coat off and strewn across one shoulder. She was sweating and panting and weary to the core, and whatever joy she may have had in reaching it was swiftly destroyed by the darkness.
Where was the welcoming light?
Through dark slats in the locked gate she could see the front door was closed, a thickly scribbled sign plastered to one side, illegible to her eyes. She searched for a buzzer, a door bell, anything. Then slid down the rock wall to join her bag on the cold cobbled road.

EVE
The young woman scowled at the phone. It hadn’t stopped ringing all morning. She answered it with a curt, “Eve magazine, Solina Malone’s phone.” She knew it wasn’t how her boss liked her to answer it, but then Solina hadn’t been spotted for two days and reprimanding her for her phone manner seemed a non-issue in the light of things.
   “It’s bloody deadline week for Christ’s sake,” howled the publisher at the other end. “Don’t tell me she still isn’t in?”
   “Sorry, Cray, not a peep.”
   “Where the hell is she?”
   “I’m not—”
  “Did you call her at home?”
  “Yes, sir, not answering.”
   “Well, did you think to go over there? Make sure she hasn’t gassed herself or something?”
Kiara thought about this for a moment. It hadn’t occurred to her, and she cheered a little at the thought.
  “No, sir but that’s a great idea, I’m onto it.”
  “Good,” the older man growled. “And, er, what’s your name again?
  “Kiara, sir,”
  “Good, Kiara, well let me know how you go. This is absurd.. Completely un-fucking-professional.”
   “Oh I agree, sir, we’re all—”
   “Solina and I are due at a Revlon lunch at one,” he interrupted, “and if she’s not found by then we can kiss the account goodbye.” And with that he was gone.

Kiara smiled. It was the longest conversation she’d ever had with the Eve publisher, the formidable Cray Jackson and, despite the tone, she had thoroughly enjoyed it. He was a large man with a bald head, a peppery moustache and a red mottled nose that suggested one too many boozy corporate lunches in his time. But the power he wielded — he published 16 titles in all — somehow endowed him with a certain rugged handsomeness that Kiara knew earned him a constant stream of flirtatious females, from the editors down. He was even rumoured to have slept with a few, despite a young blonde trophy at home, but Kiara doubted Solina had ever come close to bedding this man. He was out of her league.

Kiara stood up. She needed to get to Solina’s house, Cray was relying on her. The very thought made her heart swell, as though he had personally invited her to come on up to the seventh floor to swap a little tete-a-tete with the big boys. Perhaps he’ll remember my name now, she thought grabbing her handbag.

Glancing around, Kiara realised that the entire office was staring at her and she thought that she would burst. It was amazing the power that had suddenly shifted to her shoulders in a matter of one day. It was as though she, the measly editorial assistant, held the key to the case of the missing editor.

That’s when Alex Jones decided to pounce. The deputy editor leapt from her desk and dashed towards her.
  “Cray hassling you?” she said. Kiara nodded. Alex drew her into Solina’s office and closed the door. “What are we going to do?”
  “Looks like I’d better take a trip to Solina’s place,” she said.
  “Exactly what I was going to suggest,” Alex said. “Just switch your phone to er,” she glanced around the office outside, “to Melissa’s. She can cover your calls.” She flung the door open and called out. “Mel, you’re on phone duty. But if Cray calls - or Solina for that matter - put them straight through to me, you hear? No-one else.”
  A young redhead waved from the other end of the office. “What about any calls that come in for Solina? Do you want to take them?”
  “Bugger that!” Alex replied. “Just take a message. It’s pretty basic stuff, Melissa, I’m sure you can handle it.” She turned back to Kiara. “OK, get going, but don’t take too long. And If you find her call me, OK? Not Cray. Me first. I’m in charge now.”
Kiara smiled stiffly and leant across her to Solina’s phone. She punched in a few numbers, diverting the line to the feature writer’s, and then picked up her bag again. Typical, she thought. It hadn’t taken long for her power to be usurped.

Solina’s house was actually a hundred-year-old semi-detached in the upmarket suburb of Balmain. It had been freshly renovated with an ornate garden planted at the front, but none of that changed the fact that it was a pokey, drafty place. Not even its million-dollar price tag could change that. Kiara had been there several times before, usually on weekends or very late at night, to deliver film for proofing or the latest Eve cover for approval. But she had never been here during the cold hard light of a working day. It had never been necessary. Until yesterday, Solina hadn’t taken so much as a sick day. In three long years.

Kiara hammered at the door, rang the doorbell long and hard, then smudged her nose up to the windows. But no movement could be detected inside. Yesterday’s mail was still in the box, soggy from the overnight rain, and she didn’t bother retrieving it and slipping it under the door. She just turned on her heel and left, barely concealing a smile.


ARTEMIS
Artemis Xydis was in a good mood. It was his favourite hour, 5 am, and even the early risers of Sarisi were only just beginning to twist and turn in their beds, one last dream before reality rushes in. He has been up since 4.30 am, watching the fishermen depart, dragging on his own rollie, a cup of thick black coffee sparking up the brain cells. He would be joining them soon, but he was in no hurry. His livelihood does not depend on it.

In the bedroom beyond, the sheets were rumpled, the mattress dipping and diving where fervent limbs had beaten it out of shape. Rosa had dropped by again. His mood darkened. He liked her well enough, but he was glad she was somebody else’s wife. He slurped another long sip of coffee, revelling in the aroma, the warmth of it in his belly, the comfort of a good cup. He considered sparking the Atomic up again as he stumped out his smoke and stood up. That’s when he saw her, a slight silhouette against the silvery sea.

He stepped back quickly into the shadows of the balcony even though she had not looked round, could not possibly have seen him. But there was something about her stance that warned him off. It was a private moment. He felt like an intruder. Yet he continued to watch, curiousity getting the better of him. And he squinted his eyes, as though that would somehow sharpen his focus.

He could tell she was not a local, not even Greek. The coat, the stance, the way her shoulders were hunched like a fortress around her neck, all told him she was a stranger here, and an uncomfortable one at that. He stepped forward slightly to get a better view. It was early for tourist season. Had she steered off track? Then suddenly she turned directly towards him and for a second he thought he had been spotted, but she looked away easily, her face caught momentarily in the amber street light. Her lips were shut, her jaw clenched tight, her large eyes darting quickly along the street. He watched as she bent down to collect her bag, her auburn locks dropping down across her face and then flying back up with an experienced flick of her head as she stood and turned without hesitation away from town.

Artemis’s first reaction was to call out to her, to tell her she was going the wrong way, but something about her stride stopped him. She seemed hurried, determined. Without doubt. It was clear she was headed towards Coso Point and, he assumed, the castle. He had better alert his mate. The tourists were coming early this year.

As he returned inside to change, Artemis had the feeling the strange woman wasn’t a tourist at all. There was something about those eyes, that jaw, those lush locks that told him she was no stranger at all. He had seen them all before.
###

Want to see more? leave a comment below or email me at:
christina.larmer@gmail.com

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Roxy Parker is back, better than ever!

Fans of my Ghostwriter Mystery series will be pleased to see the third book has finally been edited and is now available on Smashwords. It will soon be up on Amazon, too, so look out for it there if you own a Kindle.

So what's this one about?

Called Last Writes, this story tells of Roxy's quest to save her beloved agent, Oliver Horowitz, from being arrested for the murder of three famous genre writers. Someone has been killing off Australia's best-selling authors—a science-fiction writer is found slashed across the wrist with an ‘X’, a gardening writer bludgeoned with his own shears, and an erotic novelist poisoned by a juicy red apple. The police believe Oliver is guilty but Roxy's not convinced. Despite the overwhelming evidence—a serious lack of alibis certainly don't help—Roxy thinks Oliver's being stitched up, and she's determined to find out why.

Who is killing the great writers of Australia?

With the help of seductive newcomer, crime reporter David Lone, Roxy tries to hunt down the killer before she becomes the hunted. Little does she know, a ghostwriter is next on the hit list! Will Roxy soon be read her own last rites?

The third book in the Ghostwriter Mystery series sees the return of Roxy’s quirky friends and family including hunky Max Farrell (how will he handle Roxy’s new love interest?), meddling mother, Lorraine, Scottish softie Lockie, and supercop Gilda Maltin.

Full of mystery, suspense and a little romance for the soft-hearted, I think this is my best book yet.
I  hope you enjoy the read.

Best wishes,
Christina

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Finis!

Hello fellow Roxy Parker fans,

You'll be glad to hear I have now finished book number three in the Ghostwriter Mystery series and it will soon be with my US editor, who does the fairy dusting. My talented designer, Stu, is also hard at work on the cover, so stay tuned for a sneak peek.

Called Last Writes, this story features all your favourite characters, including Roxy's slothful agent Oliver, her chirpy police friend Gilda, and the handsome Mr Farrell, who, you will be pleased to hear, has not quite given up on commitment-phobe Roxy. In this story, set about six months after book number two, Roxy finds herself in the middle of a series of baffling murders. Someone is targeting writers this time, and with three successful authors dead, panic begins to set in. Roxy's not so worried about herself as Oliver. He's just become Suspect Number 1, and he hasn't got an alibi to stand on.

As Roxy attempts to clear Oliver's name, she also finds herself embroiled in a love triangle with newcomer, David Lone, a handsome and successful author whose life may also be in danger. Lone has asked Roxy to write his life story and is proving surprisingly attractive. Will Roxy finally open her heart to a man? And how will Max react?

In this book we also meet Max's sassy sister, Caroline, are reunited with Roxy's nagging mother, Lorraine, and take a terrifying road trip up the north coast of Australia, where a ruthless killer is plotting Roxy's last rites...

Last Writes will be available as an ebook in December.

Happy reading.

xo Christina

Friday, June 15, 2012

SNEAK PEEK: Last Writes (a Ghostwriter Mystery)


NOTE FROM THE AUTHOR:

Dear readers,
I am currently half-way through writing the third in the Ghostwriter Mystery series. This one is called Last Writes and features a madman who is killing off some of Australia's popular niche writers, from a sci-fi writer to an erotic novelist. Roxy must hunt him down before he turns to his next target, a ghostwriter (gulp!) ...
I'd like to share the start of this book with you (see below) and thank all those who have been in touch via email (or commenting below) to tell me what they love most about Roxy Parker. It's always great to hear from readers, and to know I've struck a chord. Keep the comments coming, guys, and happy reading!
xo Christina

By C.A. Larmer

Prologue
The drugging had been relatively easy but it wasn’t over yet. He needed to leave a message, to make him pay. He searched around the room until his eyes settled on a butcher knife in the kitchen. Yes, that would do nicely. Slowly, methodically, he made his way over to it, picked it up with both hands and returned to the bed. His hands shaking, he picked up one thin, white wrist and began to slash at it, first this way, then that.
“This will teach you to mess with me,” he said. “Now you’ll be sorry.”
Then he let the blood-splattered knife drop to the floor.


Chapter 1 
A shrill sound blasted through a thirsty sleep and Roxy sat up with a start, glancing, bleary-eyed towards her clock radio. It was just after 8:00 a.m. and the phone was screaming like a demented catbird. She groaned and, feeling the full force of one-too-many champagnes, grappled for the hands-free receiver.
“Hmmm?”
“Roxy?”
“Hmmm.”
“Don’t tell me you were still asleep?”
Roxy located her black Rayban glasses on the bedside table, wedged them into place and rechecked the clock.
“Oliver, it’s 8:04 on Saturday morning, you’re supposed to still be asleep.” She sat up, a little more alert now. “What the hell are you doing up at this hour?”
Roxy’s agent, Oliver Horowitz was a classic insomniac. That meant late nights pacing his Kings Cross apartment and late mornings catching up on Zzzs. He rarely got to work before 10:00 a.m. and, it being Saturday, should not even be vertical for at least another three hours. “What’s going on?”
“Just had some bad news. Tragic, actually.”
“Oh?”
“One of my writers is dead.”
“Oh.” She digested this for a second. “Shit. Who? What happened?”
A deep groan. “Don’t really wanna go over it on the phone. Can you come meet me? For a coffee. I need to unload.”
Now it was her turn to groan. She liked death stories as much as the next person. Hell, a lot more if truth be told. It was her one true indulgence, her sick little fetish, as her friend Max would say. But it was 8:04 a.m. for God’s sake. She glanced again at the clock. Make that 8:06.
“Come on, Roxy, I’m down at Peepers, five seconds from your place.” A pause. “The death could be suspicious. Maybe even murder. Coppers have already grilled me.”
Now he had her hooked. Roxy rubbed the sleep from her eyes and said, “I’ll be there in ten.”

As she wrestled her way out of the sheets and into the bathroom, Roxy wondered which of Oliver’s clients had kicked the bucket. She hoped it wasn’t investigative reporter David Lone, she’d only just met the guy. She scowled at herself in the mirror.
I bet it bloody is, she thought. It would be just her luck.
Roxy had ben introduced to the luscious Mr Lone the night before, at his film premiere, and there had been an instant spark, or at least she had felt one. Of course it could have had something to do with the six champagnes she’d knocked back before he’d even caught her eye. Roxy didn’t normally drink a lot but last night she couldn’t help herself. Not only was the grog free, and who can resist free grog? But it had been weeks since she’d gone out and she was determined to have a good time, even if it killed her.
And it had been a good time, Roxy thought, as she surveyed the damage in the mirror in front of her: smudged mascara, a pillow crease across one cheek, blood-shot eyes.
Bloody hell, she was going to need more than 10 minutes to smooth this mess out. She turned the tap on, squirted some cleanser onto her face and got scrubbing, erasing the remnants of the night while the memories flooded back...

A (2ND) NOTE FROM THE AUTHOR:

Dear readers: If you enjoyed that excerpt and haven't read any of my Ghostwriter mysteries, please head straight to Amazon where you'll find the first two books in the series:
Killer Twist - a free ebook
Plot to Die For - available for just 99c
You can also download my other crime series: The Agatha Christie Book Club 


Thanks for all your support
xo Christina

Thursday, May 24, 2012

To push or not to push

He'd spent weeks psyching himself up for the 2 km cross country race. Was determined he'd run well, hell he might even qualify for Regionals if he gave it his best shot. So when my eight-year-old suddenly choked a minute before the race was due to start, refusing to go in, refusing to run the race, I was surprised and disappointed. But mostly, I was disappointed for him.

Suddenly the proud little boy who'd won the Small Schools Championship, entered District and qualified for Zone, and who had his shoes on and legs limbering up, had a minor meltdown. He looked terrified, wounded, unable to cope.

"I don't want to run Mum. You can't make me. I won't!"

He was right, I couldn't make him. I also didn't know whether I should even try. What was the right reaction here? What was the reaction that was not going to turn my boy into a reluctant sportsman or a quitter for life?

Should I have insisted he step up and run the bloody race? Was that too harsh? Too 1955? Would he come away with a fierce hatred for competition after that?

Should I have given him a cuddle and told him it was all okay, it didn't really matter in the great scheme of life? Was that too soft and flippant, and so typical today? We're so keen to bubble-wrap our kids now, we often don't push them into taking risks that help them grow into bold and confident adults. Would this one day lead to him walking out before the HSC, quipping, "It's too hard, I don't want to do it, you can't make me!"

Or should I have made light of the whole thing and left it at that?

It's hard to know how to react to our children's little meltdowns and it's hard to react naturally when there are scores of other parents and children watching, intrigued and judgmental from the sidelines. But I tried to cajole him into running, I tried to walk him to the start, and when that failed, I bent down and told him he would regret this decision, that he was letting his team and, more importantly, himself down. "It doesn't matter if you come first or last, you're a winner just for entering the race," I spurted. The usual cliches.

It didn't make a jot of difference. He wouldn't budge. And so we left with our tails between our legs and felt flat for the rest of the day.

Monday, April 30, 2012

How to publish on Amazon—an amateur Aussie's guide

I'm no tech expert, don't purport to be, but I have become an amateur expert in my own right and I might be able to help you if you're as eager to self publish as I am.

Over the past few months I have put three ebooks on Amazon and Smashwords (122 sales and counting...) and am now making them all available as paperbacks via Amazon's CreateSpace print-on-demand option.

What an amazing option! Did you know it costs about $4 to get a paperback proof dummied up and another ten to get it posted, express, across the sea to Aus? How insanely cheap is that?

Did you know the whole process took just two weeks? Two weeks, people! That's incredible, and a far stretch from the old days of spending thousands and waiting months...

It's so easy I can't believe more people aren't doing it. All you need is a cover with spine and back cover (a cinch with the right skills or designer on board), about two hours to cut and paste your copy into the template, and Bob's your uncle!

The hardest bit for me was determining what to sell the paperback for. Some books sell for $5.99. Some for $21.87... I chose somewhere in between, and my first crime novel will be available as a paperback for $10.99 very soon.

Wanna know how I did it?

Wanna just get that beloved novel out of the hard-drive and up on the internet? 

Tackling with formatting problems or looking for design/editing tips and contacts?

Get in touch. I look forward to sharing all that I have learned. Us DIYers need to stick together...

Monday, January 23, 2012

Invisible? Moi?

I tried not to take offense. Hell, I needed the money so I could swallow my damn pride. But when an editor of a glossy women's magazine asked me to write a story about Invisible Women Syndrome - that strange phenomenon where you kind of fade away once you get in your mid-late 40s, being ignored by waiters, sales assistants and builders alike - I couldn't help feeling a little irked.

Had I really got to THAT stage in life? Do people really look through me, not seeing me anymore because I'm aging? My friend Amanda says it happens to her, regularly. She's older than me and even more beautiful, so I was surprised by this but grateful for her honesty which I use in my piece.

I did come up with examples of my own, but it's early days for me. I know it will be more obvious (and I less so) as I age. But I also know it doesn't matter. In the story I write about the liberation of middle-age, of not being on constant show, of laughing at the young chicks in stilettos at muddy music festivals while I trudge happily through in biker boots.

There's lots to love and loathe about getting older. But there's one thing I really look forward to—not having to brace myself every time I walk past a building site.

I'd love to hear YOUR experiences of this - get in touch! Comment below or email me: christina.larmer@gmail.com

xo